To Disturb and Annoy

Family, because this week covers Joseph Smith History 1:1-25 in Come Follow Me, I thought I might share an experience I had as a missionary inspired by verse 20. Today it makes me think of the missionaries in our own family, Brandon and Collin.

I was in my first area, and I was having a sleepless night – feeling overwhelmed with the responsibility it is to be a missionary.

Instead of just laying in bed, I decided to study the scriptures. I opened to Joseph Smith History 1: 20 where Joseph says, "It seems as though the adversary was aware, at a very early period of my life, that I was destined to prove a disturber and an annoyer of his kingdom; else why should the powers of darkness combine against me?"

As I pondered that, I had a sort of revelatory experience and the words to a poem came to me as I wrote.

To Disturb and Annoy Destined to disturb Destined to annoy Knelt praying in the trees A 14-year old boy A type and shadow of the one Rejected and despised Knelt praying in the trees Afflicted for my crimes Both seized and bound by darkness Both desperate for a light both Both delivered from their chains As they pled with all their might One smitten, chastised, scourged One tarred, feathered, burned Both betrayed, imprisoned But the other cheek was turned My heart cries how oh father Could you ever let this be? But before the sobs escape my lips The answer comes to me Their love needs be rewarded And this, the greatest love of men These are they who gave their lives In service of their friends Like lambs to the slaughter Yet calm as the morn These two were killed But I have been born So what can I do To honor their names? What must I do While earth lauds their fame? The voice of a trump The rushing of wind Must echo from me Their chosen friend I have been measured I have been bought I was ordained And this is my lot Destined to disturb Destined to annoy In a land so far from home A 19-year old boy

Since writing that poem I've been blessed to wander the Sacred Grove in Palmyra and Gethsemane in Jerusalem – the groves themselves symbolic of what would happen in them. The maples were annually sapped by the Smith's taps in order to produce syrup, just as Joseph was sapped of his physical and spiritual strength, seized upon and powerless. The olives of Gethsemane, a word that actually means "oil press," were annually harvested and crushed with incredible weight in the olive press, just as the Savior bore the weight of the world and bled from every pore. When olives are pressed, blood-red oil seeps through the pores of the olives before it settles into the golden color we're familiar with.

As I've wandered and pondered in those two Sacred groves of trees, reflecting on their symbolism and significance, the words of the Holy Ghost have come into my mind as clear as any I have ever heard or seen. I know what the scriptures say happened there really did happen there. I've felt that surety within my heart and mind and know it to be true. I know that all of us can have that knowledge, and that all of us can be disturbers and annoyers of the adversary.